Back in the day, the historical perspective on nurses was one that painted a picture of virginal angels of mercy who doted over doctors, tended to patients without complaint, and lived in nun-like simplicity with an eye towards service and devotion to the assistance of physicians. This Old World image of the nurse as selfless servant continues to this day in a variety of guises, and I feel that many nurses have unwittingly internalized this "raison d'etre".
When I speak with many of my coaching clients or potential coaching clients, these nurses often verbalize extremely similar complaints:
- Not having time to use the bathroom during shifts
- Dehydrating themselves at work so they don't have to use the bathroom
- Having no time to eat during shifts
- Working mandatory overtime
- Working as hard at home as they do at work
- Feeling like their families and friends ask too much of them
- Suffering bullying, intimidation and incivility at work
- Feeling like they have no energy or time to care for themselves
At work, we concentrate, give it our all, and run full tilt through our days with nary a thought for our own well-being. This calculation must change if we are to be healthy, fully functional, happy and fulfilled.
Self care is an unavoidable and undeniable part of being a happy, healthy and functional person, and nurses are often the individuals who ignore their own needs over the needs of others, pushing self care into the veritable background.
When we, as nurses, begin to focus on our own needs and desires, bringing our attention to what makes us happy and healthy and brings us balance, the ripple effect is often almost palpable.
Nurses can serve as examples, leaders, and models of good self care, and when we teach our patients and clients about self care from a place of personal integrity--and practicing what we preach--we are more believable and effective in our communication.
Nurses work hard, and we focus our professional (and sometimes personal) lives on the care of others. This is all well and good, but it is the care of the self--body, mind, spirit and soul--that carries us through our days.